New Look

As the year is ending, I would like to jump-start the coming New Year with  new look, new thoughts and ideas. That is the reason for the revamped page.

When parents become kids...

As parents we always want to teach our kids the right things - how to share, how to treat other people with respect, how to be fair to everyone, how to be humble and so on. But how many of us really believe in the morals we teach our kids? Do we really, truly believe in all the values we teach our kids? This is a question we need to ask ourselves. At an early age, kids can figure out that our actions do not sync up with our words. Also, recently there is a growing obsession with one's kids. I understand we all love our kids to death, however we have to remember that every kid is born with a special talent and is different and wonderful in some way. Every parent thinks their kid is smart, creative and intelligent little human being, even if he/she is not. So please stop talking about your kid as the "gifted" one. I am tired of such parents in playgroup and social gatherings. They will not directly tell praise their kid, however will use every opportunity to indicate that their kid is ahead in the race..what race you may ask? like potty training, learning to walk, talk, knowing their ABC's, being social, the list goes on.

Life is too short. Enjoy your kids AND also others kids. Learn to appreciate the beauty in God's every creation. Stop this obsession. No matter how "gifted" you kid is, there is definitely a kid in some part of the world who is better than your kid. Learn to love your kids as they are...sorry for being so preachy, but I cannot take it anymore!!!

Can i have it all?

Image Courtesy: http://themomcoach.typepad.com

Oh my God! I am totally at crossroads in my life right now. It is comforting to know that Laksh also went through the same thing. I am so torn between working full-time and being there for my son. I know very well that he is getting the attention he needs and is being well taken care of emotionally and physically, yet I cannot get over the feeling that I ought to be with him. I do not think it is guilt. I just think that I enjoy being with my son so much that I miss him during the day when Iam at work. I would love to work from home at least 2 days a week, but I do not have that choice now. Even if I work from home I do not think that is equivalent to being with him all day, focusing on him, doing fun activities with him. I just miss that. I have the choice to quit, but that would mean more struggle down the line – giving up a good career and starting all over again. Since you kids will need you in some way or other for the next 10 years, re-starting a dead career will be more of a challenge, when you are not doing something. As it is, this break has been difficult for me, as I took off from the workforce for 2 years. A mother is not allowed to take even 2 years to raise a child? I really hope the work environment offers more part-time and flexible options for mothers. Also, I really hope the workforce is lenient towards mothers taking a break to raise their kids. In the end, it will be a win-win situation, because happy mothers mean happy kids and happy kids hold promise for better generation that is secure and high-achieving. As a mother, I never underestimate my constant presence in my son’s life. I wish I could have it all!!!

Resolve, Determination, Persistence really means..

Read Iron Woman

Americanized

Well, what should I be doing now? Studying, applying for jobs, catching up on sleep, exercising?? After all this is my break time (my son is napping). Instead what am I doing? Blogging. Why? Because it is so very difficult to stop and capture the train of thoughts, for a later point in time (anyways there is no later point in time to blog).

Coming to the topic, isn't it strange? I mean to love the things we once hated and to hate the things we once loved? Here are few examples:

When I came into this country I had to work in an ice-cream shop. Of course we got free milk-shakes and ice-creams anytime we wanted. I wish I knew more about fat/saturated fat/trans fat/empty calories back then, I wouldn't have made ice-cream my lunch and dinner. Well, I always thought I would be a 'back of bones'. I was wrong. Age and weight catch up with you fast. Anyways, back to the point..I used to hate mint-chocolate chip flavor. I used to think why do "these" people like this tooth-paste (min-choco ice-cream used to taste like indian tooth-paste to me) so much?

When my roommates used to drag me to Tacobell, I used to crave the indian wrap (whatever they call them, i forgot the name).

I used to love the idea of returning back to India to live close to my relatives. I loved the idea of meeting them everyday and they being part of our lives and spending time with them. I loved the idea of joint-family system.

Fast forward, 9+ years:

I really like indian tooth-paste for an ice-cream.
I crave tacobell food over the indian wrap.
I am happy being in U.S of A, my independent self, leading an independent life-style. I hate the constant interference of relatives when I go to India. I find life claustrophobic with too many rules to adhere to and too many pretensions to live by with my relatives constantly hovering around us. However, I love to live close to my parents (i hope that does not change :-)).

Sometimes, it is scary to realize that you change so much. Is this what they refer as becoming "Americanized"?

Occupation: Mother

Well since I have glorified motherhood, let me also share some of its challenges. On a day to day basics being a stay at mom and the primary caregiver for your baby can be frustrating. The routine of doing the same thing everyday almost exactly the same time, yet having some totally unpredictable days can get to you. For a person who hates routine, having a baby has been a huge transition. My baby has taught me the value of being in a rigid routine and sticking to it. I can never go back to being the person I once was.

Coping with the frustrations of being a stay-at-mom, I have found what helps me is treating, caring for child like working for a job. For example, we have routine days at work and yet some days are totally unpredictable ones. How do we handle this? Since, we are paid to do the job, we try to keep focus, we try to find ways to keep ourselves motivated, likewise being with my baby all day I have tried to find ways to keep myself sane and happy.

While, doing a good or bad job at work, can only impact our performance review, same is not true while taking care of our babies. As a parent, I totally feel that bringing a person into this world comes with a huge commitment - it is definitely the most important job on earth. As much as I want to do my best in the most important job, I have ever had, I find myself at times doubting myself. I am sure I am learning everyday. One thing I can easily say is that, of all the jobs I have ever held, this is the best job I have had. Even though it has its frustrating moments, I totally and completely love every bit of my work!!

Three cheers to motherhood!! :-)

Magic of Motherhood

I am no poet. In fact far from it, but why do I feel like writing a poem about the magic of motherhood?


At the end of a really trying and tiring day, why does the exuberant smile on my baby's face in response to my silly sounds make my day?


On seeing me, why does my baby crawling towards me from the end of the room and gesturing 'pick me up' makes every minute worthwhile?


When my baby stands up and takes his first few steps looking at me for encouragement and support, why does my heart brim with joy and pride at his achievement?


When my baby goes deep into slumber while listening to my special song for him, why do I feel a deep sense of contentment as if the most important job was well done?


When I see my baby and husband sleeping peacefully next to each other, why I do feel as if life is as it should be?